Midnight craze

Drowned in the pitch darkness,
Night seems sunk and dead outside.
Nothing but voices of barking dogs
Reverberate in my ears inside.
Patter of rain on the roof 
Appears like beating of drums.
Thank god! Winter is bidding adieu
And as spring knocks at the door of time
I wait embrace it.
A new moment is here for us!

Weird feelings

Down the hills running and rushing, 
One part of my mind ask me to bunk,
To the place where I am beckoned,
To the place where I belong.
Everything wants me back 
Yet I am held back--
Held by a responsibility to myself
And for the future.

Departure

That moment when you depart from home, 
And to faraway place you are gone,
Doesn't your heart pain? 
Doesn't your voice crack
When you bid farewell to your mum?
A major disastrous pang of throttling pain
happens,
To your mum.
A woman who brought you up to be a man
What must have happened?
Departure is the toughest moment of life!
And more than that,
To live with a feeling that you are left alone
Consumes you entirely!

memories

How could I erase those memories 
That linger in my life like a dream? 
Those childhood days 
That brought excitement and fun 
That bruised our knees 
And caused stumbling on pebbles
Still tickle my senses
As I dig times to look for past days.
Hide and seek
Police and thief
Come fresh in my mind.
In the remnants of paddy,
Running for different games,
And when lost succumbing to
Running after cattle in turn
Pulls tears off my eyes.
Such were the moments,
Such was life!

Death

Death

Who are we to claim an individual world?

We are the slaves of time

And puppets of death!

Are we not moving with time

Like being dragged along?

As though we are the sun

Entrapped in the phenomenon of

Rising and setting,

We have our life

Coming and going!

Yesterday fades within our sight,

And today comes from far

Yet envious tomorrow takes

All we have

All we gather.

As air stops moving in us,

Like a log of wood we lay down flat

For devil organisms to feed on our flesh.

What we were a while ago

And what do we become a while after?

Time takes toll on us

And one day,

We become servants of the death.

Life is but a death in disguise!

Death

Death

Who are we to claim an individual world?

We are the slaves of time

And puppets of death!

Are we not moving with time

Like being dragged along?

As though we are the sun

Entrapped in the phenomenon of

Rising and setting,

We have our life

Coming and going!

Yesterday fades within our sight,

And today comes from far

Yet envious tomorrow takes

All we have

All we gather.

As air stops moving in us,

Like a log of wood we lay down flat

For devil organisms to feed on our flesh.

What we were a while ago

And what do we become a while after?

Time takes toll on us

And one day,

We become servants of the death.

Life is but a death in disguise!

A letter to a woman who has  taught me how to survive. Happy international Day!

Dear mum

How I wish that you could read these lines and understand what a son has in his heart. As I grow up each day to be a matured man, I remember all bit of burden you had to lift to groom us. Gradually I am learning that since the day you showed me this world, your umbrella of love has been protecting me from all kind of weathers. Thank you, thank you very much for all you have been to me. I promise you, one day I will make you proud and happy. I shall work hard each day to live up to your expectation.

As a woman of Twentieth century, I can imagine myself how difficult it might have been to put up with typical a grandma of those times. I have seen, felt and realized how tough life has been in bringing up three of us. In meeting the needs of three different versions of devils, I can imagine what might have happened to you. Meeting the need of small kids, ask me, mum—I have seen it with my eyes. Often time when I went against you while you asked me to work, I remember you saying “Let me see how you can deny to your wife later when you marry”.  I always fear, as I recollect it now. I fear that I may become a biased man, who would do less to a woman who did so much to me and more to a woman who just comes into my life after I start earning (LOL). Sometimes when we finish taking dinner and volunteer to wash dishes, my mum, I learning to respect and love you. I am learning to be fair with you and my wife later.

Those times when I might have defecated on the bed, I can imagine how coolly you would have cleaned it. Sometimes when I might have wept late night and woke you up from a tiring day’s sweet sleep, how calmly you would have consoled me and put me back to sleep. I can imagine, mum. I can feel the pain that might have inflicted you. Upon defeating inside the pants, how warmly you might have wiped my bottom! I know, it demands a lot of substance inside the big heart—and that you possessed it as a mum.

As a woman, sometimes you played a role of a father in managing household economy. Sometimes you played a role of friend in hearing my problems and find a solution. As a woman of old times; of that era when grandma used to be the boss and husband, the commander, I can imagine how squeezing your life might have been. Dancing on the tune of bossy grandmas, I know, several times you might have wanted to cry and oppose. Dear mum, you don’t need to explain me as to how it feels to be an upholder of bloody typical Hindu culture. A woman of your time, I know, might have been thought of a slave-in-disguise. Freedom and right might have been stolen from you. For being such a strong woman who could grow up with such confined liberty, I salute you.

Mum, you need not worry now. Three of us are growing up. We have a lot of dreams if fate gives accompanies to us. Bit by bit, I have already started sewing patches of dreams. I have already stated dreaming of our goo days. Those days when hardship thrashed us black and blue; when fate was a   rival of ours and good days were out of our reach, I remember how we survived. It was a spirit you continued holding unto that kept us alive. If good days are what you can see beckoning from hills back, it is the product of your dedications and prayers.

Mum, I remember you fasting very often for religious reason. Often times I would condemn you for being so religious but now I started knowing the reason—you always prayed for our wellbeing and success. As a man, I would never dare do such good thing for entire members of family. Yet, a woman like you always thought more of the family than yourself. As woman you always signified an angel in disguise.

Mum, how I wish you knew somebody whom you loved so much thinks of your deeds and generosity!

I have never told you I love you. I never embraced you but I promise you, as a son I have always loved you. I don’t take picture with you the way I do with friends and other, but deep down my heart, I always love you. I exist because you do. I can’t imagine a life without you.

Thank you for all the love and care you have bestowed upon three of us. We are still kids running to be protected under your umbrella of love and care. Thank you for being the woman I always think of.

Thank you

Your loving son.