A letter to a woman who has taught me how to survive. Happy international
Day!
Dear mum
How I wish that you could read these lines and understand
what a son has in his heart. As I grow up each day to be a matured man, I remember
all bit of burden you had to lift to groom us. Gradually I am learning that
since the day you showed me this world, your umbrella of love has been
protecting me from all kind of weathers. Thank you, thank you very much for all
you have been to me. I promise you, one day I will make you proud and happy. I
shall work hard each day to live up to your expectation.
As a woman of Twentieth century, I can imagine myself how difficult
it might have been to put up with typical a grandma of those times. I have seen,
felt and realized how tough life has been in bringing up three of us. In
meeting the needs of three different versions of devils, I can imagine what
might have happened to you. Meeting the need of small kids, ask me, mum—I have
seen it with my eyes. Often time when I went against you while you asked me to
work, I remember you saying “Let me see how you can deny to your wife later
when you marry”. I always fear, as I recollect
it now. I fear that I may become a biased man, who would do less to a woman who
did so much to me and more to a woman who just comes into my life after I start
earning (LOL). Sometimes when we finish taking dinner and volunteer to wash
dishes, my mum, I learning to respect and love you. I am learning to be fair
with you and my wife later.
Those times when I might have defecated on the bed, I can
imagine how coolly you would have cleaned it. Sometimes when I might have wept
late night and woke you up from a tiring day’s sweet sleep, how calmly you
would have consoled me and put me back to sleep. I can imagine, mum. I can feel
the pain that might have inflicted you. Upon defeating inside the pants, how warmly
you might have wiped my bottom! I know, it demands a lot of substance inside
the big heart—and that you possessed it as a mum.
As a woman, sometimes you played a role of a father in
managing household economy. Sometimes you played a role of friend in hearing my
problems and find a solution. As a woman of old times; of that era when grandma
used to be the boss and husband, the commander, I can imagine how squeezing your
life might have been. Dancing on the tune of bossy grandmas, I know, several
times you might have wanted to cry and oppose. Dear mum, you don’t need to
explain me as to how it feels to be an upholder of bloody typical Hindu
culture. A woman of your time, I know, might have been thought of a
slave-in-disguise. Freedom and right might have been stolen from you. For being
such a strong woman who could grow up with such confined liberty, I salute you.
Mum, you need not worry now. Three of us are growing up. We
have a lot of dreams if fate gives accompanies to us. Bit by bit, I have
already started sewing patches of dreams. I have already stated dreaming of our
goo days. Those days when hardship thrashed us black and blue; when fate was
a rival of ours and good days were out
of our reach, I remember how we survived. It was a spirit you continued holding
unto that kept us alive. If good days are what you can see beckoning from hills
back, it is the product of your dedications and prayers.
Mum, I remember you fasting very often for religious reason.
Often times I would condemn you for being so religious but now I started
knowing the reason—you always prayed for our wellbeing and success. As a man, I
would never dare do such good thing for entire members of family. Yet, a woman like
you always thought more of the family than yourself. As woman you always signified
an angel in disguise.
Mum, how I wish you knew somebody whom you loved so much
thinks of your deeds and generosity!
I have never told you I love you. I never embraced you but I
promise you, as a son I have always loved you. I don’t take picture with you
the way I do with friends and other, but deep down my heart, I always love you.
I exist because you do. I can’t imagine a life without you.
Thank you for all the love and care you have bestowed upon
three of us. We are still kids running to be protected under your umbrella of
love and care. Thank you for being the woman I always think of.
Thank you
Your loving son.
