A letter from a mom
to her son
As I write this to you, I can’t help shed tears that drain
off my eyes. Deep down my heart, there seems an unusual pang of despair. Each
day as you grow up to be an adult, you seem being fading from my proximity and
the thought that you are near me. You have grown up to be someone who I now
have to make an appointment to meet.
When you were small, I have cleaned your shit. You used to defecate
on your pants but I never hesitated cleaning if off. You were a little baby so
innocent that I dependent upon you to survive. Once on a journey, when I asked the bus driver
to stop for some time for you to vomit, he didn’t listen and I had to let you
vomit on my cloth .Everyone near me closed their eyes and looked me with hatred
but I attacked them back with my smile. When I didn’t get a seat on a bus, I carried
you on my back so that you would be comfortable and I stood like many guys. Sometimes
even when I got a seat and there were abundant I carried you on my lap and make
you sleep by caressing your hair. You would sleep peacefully on my lap and I would
remain awake for a long journey.
Sometimes when I was away from you, you would fall down and
cry. I had to console you by letting you suckle my nipples. There would be many
people around me but I never hesitated to expose my breast just to make you
comfortable and happy. When at times, your father came home late with his carelessness
and carefree life, I used to narrate you some cooked up fairytale to put you
into slumber. After you slept, I would wait late night without taking a morsel
of food. When I had to work but you would cry, I used to carry you on my back. I
used to drag some reluctant and stubborn cattle with you on my back. Sometime, you
used to sit on the heavy sack of rice I carried from mills and sing innocent
songs.
Very often during dinner time when I would sit for a plate
of rice, you would cry so bad that I had to console and comfort you to sleep
with my unwashed hands. By then, appetite with which I would sit, would be gone.
When you would vomit on my hand as I fed you some morsel of rice, I wouldn’t
wash it. I would find no reason to feel bad for.
Gradually you grew into adult and from toddler to a man now I
can see you travel alone. As you have become an independent man, I have experienced
a feeling of missing you. I know you must be busy setting your life; sewing
every bit of dreams to realize a beautiful reality and travelling paths that
will lead you to a better destination. I also know whatever you must be doing,
it will be good.
However, every night I lie on the bed, I feel somewhere I have
started losing you: You don’t seem bothering about me and your father. Every
day, I wait for your call. I want to hear you talk this and that; ask me about
your father, grandma and our neighbor. Above all, I want to see you call me and make me feel that you do
remember me. I know it will be tough for you to call me every day, for you must
be busy in your study and duty. I would be excited to receive your call
sometimes—yes, steal a moment from your busy schedule. Call me. Call your dad. Call
your grandma and relatives.
We always want you to be at our sight, but I know education
and exposure is must. Therefore, we admitted you to school after a series of pleas
to headmaster. After you went away to study, your dad and I remain alone at
home. In the evening, by the oven with reddened ambers and yellow flames, we
talk of you: We wish you had a beautiful life filled with dream-come true
moments. We talk about you on what you must have been doing .We talk of how you
used to be and we keep worrying about you, inspite of that fact that you have
grown up.
Sometimes, perhaps, you are angry with you girlfriend or friends
and you switch off your phone. We worry about you a lot. We worry as why your
phone is switched off. Please, take care of your life. Don’t make your life
miserable with small misunderstanding with you girl friend. Don’t drink to
overcome despair and disappointment .Your father and I are always there for
you, no matter what. When we have raised you to this age, never divert yourself
and life towards a selfish and problematic girlfriend.We doesn’t want to lose
you. Every bit of my organ wants you with me.
Sometimes, when you get time from your busy schedule, come
home. Your father and I will be always waiting for you. If you just say, you
are coming home; I will be sitting in wait on the corridor with my eyes staring
at the road you would emerge from. I would be preparing you meals. for you might reach home hungry. You father always says to me that we won’t ask you to work for
us. We would just love to have you at our sight the way I wanted you to be on
lap when you were a kid. You don’t need to plough the field, you dad would do. You
don’t need to tether the goat and cattle, I and your father would do. All we
want is you and your presence. Your father and I will make sure you are
protected under the scorching sun the way we have been doing. We will bear beneath
the scorching sun and get tanned while you can be home, watch TV or sleep and
develop your complexion. You must become smarter so that you would remain more
busy in the school or college, dating. (LOL).Please son, come home at least
during vacation, leaving your busy schedule. We want to see you for once.
With much love to you, my son
Thanking you
Your loving mother